Shoes In The Back Hall

We have a back hall in our home.  A space between our family room and our garage.  We use this space more than we do our front door.  Each day we travel "to" and "from" using this space.  It is a transient space.  A space created to usher from one place to the next.  This space is also small; so narrow that if the backdoor and closet door are both open one cannot pass through.

This transient space often becomes a bottleneck for us.  Coming home with arms full of groceries: crowded space.  3 school kids trying to get out the door with backpacks, instruments, and lunches in tow: crowded space. 

Yesterday when I came home (through the usual, narrow, crowded passage-way) I was held up by my kids' shoes scattered and clogging up the hallway (I had difficulty getting the door all the way open because of their shoes).  My initial reaction was to holler (out of frustration) at the kids to come clean up their shoes and "put them away properly" (like I've told them so many times before!).  Yet I held on for a moment.  No hollering came.  Instead I was graced by something else: vision to see what I usually miss.

In that moment I heard God remind me, "There will be a day, not too far off, when you will long to trip over your kids' shoes."

In that moment I found myself pausing.  Stopping and really seeing what is.

That was the "long, loving look" that Walter Burghardt talks about.  The privilege to see scattered shoes as more than a nuisance, inconvenience, and obstacle to my final arrival home.  I was reminded of the joy my kids bring me, reminded of all the places their shoes take them, and reminded of how small their feet were when they were born.

I was reminded that cumbersome spaces of transition are often a gift.

May you be given the capacity to look deeply into the cluttered, disorganized, confining, transition of life; that you might be overwhelmed with the truth that even there, you are home.

A Decade Old

Creative.

Silly.

Insightful.

Goofy.

Adventurous.

Compassionate.

Energetic.

Sensitive.

Tenderhearted.

Fun-Loving.

a Gift.

Key Chain

Lilly came up from the craft room (hard at work with glue, glitter, and scissors) and presented me with the best key chain ever. If she keeps this up she may just get anything she asks for.

Thank You For This Chicken

Recently at the dinner table our son Luke offered the prayer before dinner and surprised me with his words, “Dear God, thank you for this chicken, the farm it came from, and please look after all of the other animals.” In this prayer Luke reminded us of some things we had forgotten.

Our food comes from somewhere.

This may seem like a no-brainer, but with all of the instant “food” so readily available to us, it becomes easy to forget (or even know) where our food comes from.

In being reminded that our food has an origin, we’ve begun asking: “Where does our food come from?” Asking this question has been a bit like opening Pandora’s Box. “Just exactly what kind of plant grows a Twinkie?”, “Do these cookies really come from tree-dwelling elves?”, and “If this apple is labeled, ‘organic’, then what kind of apple is this?… ‘Industrial’?”

Our questions have led us to make some changes in the food we purchase. Each Tuesday Misty stops by Grassfields Farm on her way home from work to pick up milk, eggs, and whatever meat they have available (we started back in January). After our first experience we instantly appreciated the taste and quality of the food but even more have grown to appreciate being able to build a relationship with those who grow/raise our food. Participating in this local farm has reminded us that we are part of a bigger creation and that we have a responsibility (and privilege) to steward what God has made.

I recognize it is in part due to our “affluence” that we have the opportunity/choice to purchase food from a local farm. Not everyone has the means of transportation to connect them to locally grown food (we live in a part of the country where farms are still common, unlike many of our cities which have become “food deserts”). Further, fresh/clean/whole food is more expensive (a cheeseburger from McD’s is 99 cents, and a head of broccoli costs close to 2 dollars). As a result, we’ve had to make some choices in the food (and amount) we purchase.

Instead of buying 2lbs of beef from the grocery store we purchase only 1 lb. at the same price from the farm. In buying less food we have begun to look at what we eat differently. Don’t get me wrong, we have plenty to eat, but having to purchase less food means that we cannot afford to think of food in terms of “mindless consumption”, instead food, animals, and the farms they come from become a “gift”.

Another gift of purchasing local food has meant that we’ve had more prep-time in preparing meals. At first this may sound more like a chore (we are all busy with the hurriedness of life) however, purchasing ingredients to make our meals has caused us to slow down. Lilly, peeling carrots for dinner, has developed a deeper appreciation for the food we eat and Caleb, chopping lettuce for salads, has caused him to be more curious about eating “leafy greens”. Instead of Mom “heating up dinner” our meals have become a family affair, full of conversation and meaning.

Is this something we do each night? No. We still have evenings where soccer games and gymnastics cause us to eat on the run, but those times are becoming less and less. We may never be able to fully live off of locally grown food however our hope is that as we do our part to steward the food resources in front of us we are able to create better, more intimate connections with our community, our kids, and our Creator.

That is something to be thankful for.

Caleb's Christmas Carol

My 10 year-old sang this song to me yesterday. The tune is familiar but the words are all him.

"Let It Flow"

(to the tune of "Let It Snow")

Oh, although the bathroom over there is frightful,

The urinal is quite delightful.

Especially if you have to go,

Let it flow, let it flow, let it flow

You'll have to excuse me, I have the sudden urge to use the restroom.

Guinea Skates

the things we do to our family pets....

Talking Dog

What's not to like about the dog?

Field Trip Week

This past week I went on two different school field trips with my boys. With my 2^nd grader, Luke, we went with his class to a camp where they learned all about habitats and the ecosystem do doing “hands on” research in the pond and wildlife studies in the forest. As one of the adult chaperones I helped the kids fill out their nature worksheets and also taught them a few other things that weren’t a part of the curriculum like: “How to burn stuff with a magnifying glass” (who knew ants popped like popcorn?). One of the highlights: playing “spider web tag” with the entire 2^nd grade class during our picnic lunch (man, those kids are fast!).

The day after Luke’s trip I went with Caleb and his 4^th grade class to Camp Pendalouan (a YMCA camp here in Western, MI). We learned about the first settlers to Michigan, the fur trade, and played another tag-like game to illustrate the workings of the food chain (elementary kids sure love their tag games!). My highlight of this day: watching my son interact with his class…he’s sweet, kind, and funny.

I have to admit that when the week 1^st began and I saw that I had two full days of school field trips in which I would not be getting any work done (yes, pastors do work during the week J I was a bit overwhelmed. Yet as I thought of the +’s and –‘s of going on the trips I was easily swayed in going when I reminded myself of one simple fact: Each one of my boys had invited me.

As my kids get older I will be invited less and less into the events of their life and so I want them to know that Mom and Dad love their invitations. Accepting their invitations communicates to them that what they do and think about matters…it shows them that their world is beautiful, interesting, and something I want to participate in.

Sure, not all of us have the flexibility of being self-employed, but going on every field trip isn’t the point (there will be plenty of field trips that even this pastor won’t be able to attend). The point is that as parents we regularly accept the invitations into our kid’s lives; doing what they would like to do, seeing what they would like us to see, and laughing at what they find funny.

Of all the things that were taught this past week what I learned most from my elementary school field trip experience was: Being invited by a child is enough of a reason to go along.

A Constructed Heart

As I was cleaning out my 1st grader’s backpack yesterday I came across this craft she had made.

I began to envision her creating this cut-out paper heart. Moving the scissors in a precise manner to give the heart its shape, intentionally placing two heart stickers on each side, and circling each word of a phrase she had memorized in her own heart and now wanted to share with others: “love god love people”.

There is a sweet simplicity to this piece, yet it came by way of a careful and deliberate construction.

May you find joy in living out this simple phrase. May you intentionally embrace all the depths of its practice in the midst of a complex world; always growing in a deeper love and obedience for the Creator and a more sacrificial love for your enemy. And may the heart that is constructed in you beat with such fervor that the hearts of others come alive with the simple hope that has found its home within you.

Luke Makes Jesus Walk On Water

Eight Is Great!

Happy Birthday buddy...we love you!

Creepy Clowns

Misty and I came across an illustration our middle child Luke drew featuring two figures (one with a gigantic neck and some kind of phaser); apparently it is a story about clowns...

"I am uncomfortable with clowns and I don't know why. They're creepy but I think they are stupid. But I still think they're creepy."

Lilly's Construction

I'm going to be honest right out of the gate on this one...I have absolutely no idea what this is. Well yes, I know...it is a combination of tooth picks, styrofoam packaging, and coffee cups. However I don't have a clue as to what they now form.

Each individual piece serves (or "served") a purpose, but I'm not sure just what purpose this "structure" serves. Even more, what are you supposed to do with it?

My 6 year old daughter Lilly is the head designer and chief architect behind this project so I figured that at least she could answer my questions...

Nope.

Lilly doesn't have any idea what this is "supposed to be" or what it is "supposed to do". Further, not "knowing" what it "is" or what it "does" doesn't really bother her. She simply appreciates it because she made it and it is hers.

Lilly's construction reminds me that the value of beauty and art cannot be measured by pragmatic functionality. It is beautiful, creative, and inspiring simply because it is.

When I look at my life, with a scrutinizing pragmatic stare, and wonder just exactly what I'm supposed to "be" and "do" (so that I can measure my worth), I need reminders that my beauty and value as a human being is not measured by mere definitive functionality, but because I am the worksmanship of the master Artisan.

Kawasaki Kids

Luke's Frog

Tuning Out TV

My family canceled cable TV at the first of the year. We did this because we noticed that the TV was becoming an easy default when there was "nothing to do". Our kids would watch it any chance they had (after homework was finished of course) and Misty and I would channel surf just to "see what's on".

The TV in our home was like the snack cupboard in the kitchen, you're not really hungry, but when you walk by it you are bound to eat something. Our family "ate" a lot of TV.

So we made the decision to get rid of cable TV (our objective was to get rid of "useless" channels, cut some excess spending, and stay connected through the free TV aired by the major networks). Down-grading would be easy, after all, we would still get local channels right?....nope. Rabbit ears were useless in trying to tune in our favorite network shows.

So here our 50 inch plasma sits...virtually useless since January 1, anxiously awaiting those few moments it gets to fulfill its calling through the Wii or a DVD (those elements aren't off limits...just monitored for time).

I remember when Misty and I first told the kids we were canceling cable TV; they cried...yeah, really (Sponge Bob junkies going through withdrawal). We missed elements of it as well (no more Today Show with coffee in the morning and no more LOST in HD).

Yet since we've tuned out TV we've noticed several things change in our daily living: our kids no longer beg us for the "latest and greatest" that is advertised to children a zillion times a day, we spend more time reading and playing together as a family, and we find ourselves going to bed getting up earlier (giving us a more productive day).

There may come a time when we decide to re-connect our cable TV, but for now we are enjoying being tuned out to TV and tuned in to family.

What are other "snack cupboards" we should try and limit in our life?

Island Retreat

For the next 12 days my family and I are "getting away". Thanks to some friends from Chicago, we are staying at a condo on an island surrounded by the Gulf of Mexico (Don Pedro Island to be exact).

On the island we pack our days full of sun, relaxation (running, reading, playing), dolphin watching, lizard catching, and body surfing (rough, I know). The best part of this trip is that we completely "unplug"

...no cell phones, no internet, no distractions...

We have made this our family vacation for the last 3 years and have some of our best family memories (our kids love hanging out with Captain Red Beard). This island get-away is an opportunity for us to refresh ourselves, re-calibrate, and rest in what is most important: each other.

How do you refresh yourself? What do you do to keep your family connected in the midst of a busy life?

New Tat

I went up to the Morg on Tuesday afternoon to have Jason put some fresh ink on my forearm. I drew up a "Day of the Dead" skull to remind me that no matter how dark things may get, life can still find a way.

My boys got inked as well, but theirs is with henna and will wash off in two weeks. When my boys asked me why they couldn't get a real one now, I simply said: "If you still think a Sponge Bob tattoo is the coolest when you turn 21, then be my guest."

Indestructible Shark

Healthy Start

I like it when I'm able to make it to the gym early in the morning. Although it doesn't happen every day (it usually depends on how early I get to bed the night before), when I get my workout done, home and showered before 6:30am, the day rolls better. Beginning my mornings with a 4:45am wake up gives me space/time to prepare holistically. Our mornings as a family become less hurried and forced. There is pace and rhythm.

One of the bonuses is that when it comes to breakfast, my kids don't have to "fend for themselves" (picture 3 children climbing on counter tops, getting ceramic bowls out of cabinets, trying to steady an all too heavy milk jug they've hoisted over the bowl of cereal they just poured) as mom and dad try and wake up and get themselves ready.

When I'm centered I have time (and space) to be available for my kids. One of the simple ways I make use of my availability is by making them breakfast. One of their favorites is oatmeal...the brown sugar, the hearty oats, and splash of cold milk makes this more like indulging in a warm cookie than eating the most important meal of the day.

Sitting with my kids as they eat their Quaker Oats allows me to be present with them. To listen to them talk about whatever is on their mind (from the silly to the curious). I realize that as my kids get older and have more commitments vying for their time, my time spent with them will be less and less. I need to make my time with them count.

I've had far too many mornings where I woke up late, and in a frantic attempt to pack lunches, check freshly brushed teeth, and get kids out the door I have gotten frustrated and snapped at them because they "weren't moving fast enough". Never a good way to start the morning.

I need "oatmeal mornings". Mornings where I have gotten my act together before the kids get up. Mornings where I can truly be present for my kids, so they can start their day off right. Mornings that remind them (even without words) that Dad loves them and is always available.