The Artist's Journey

The artist committing himself to his calling has volunteered for hell, whether he knows it or not.  He will be dining for the duration on a diet of isolation, rejection, self-doubt, despair, ridicule, contempt, and humiliation.

- Stephen Pressfield

Not really a comforting thought.

Yet...

While the life of the artist is filled with heartache and difficulty, the alternative life of ignoring your passions and serving the "supposed to" is simply unlivable.

Your pursuit of living the artist within you will take you to the end of yourself.  This journey will strip away the things that make living the artist's life impossible: the need for conformity, approval, and a 'fan club'.  And this is percisely the journey you need to take; it is a shedding of an old self.

It's time to get lean, get resourceful, and discover who you truly are.

Journey on.

Nothing To Prove

You don't have to prove yourself.  Not to your boss, your ex, your teacher, your co-worker, your children, your client, your parents, the world, or even yourself.

No more energy wasted on being defensive, no more time wasted trying to convince, no more heart-ache "living-up to".

Let that never-ending, self-defeating, cycle of exhaustion go.

Instead, focus your energy on offering your best self; simply because it brings joy.

Filler For the Masses

If you are concerned with gaining a following your art will suffer.  Your over-concern with what you think others think they want will leave you second-guessing, cutting corners, and selling-out.

Continue on this path long enough and your art will cease being art and become cheap-filler, white-noise, bland and uninspiring.  You may get others to sign-up and sign-on, but each time you do it will be a death a thousand times over to the true artist within.

Living Gift

The world would have you believe that you are an impulse.  A stomach to be fed, a reaction that cannot be contained, an urge to be fulfilled.

You are marketed to, tantalized, wooed-in, and teased.

A consumer.

Something to be controlled.

Something to be manipulated.

Something to be used.

But these things are a twist of the reality; a perversion of the truth.

You are a gift.

Designed to be given.

Designed for generosity.

Made in Love.

Doodle Bomb

Nagel texted me this doodle.  I'm not sure what this bomb has in mind but his intentions don't seem virtuous (little does Mr. Doodle Bomb know, his fuse won't last the walk to my house)..

What doodle will you send a friend today?

Pretending There Is No Pain

The act of pain-suppression is never a good remedy for healing... it only makes our pain more concentrated; more acute.

When you are wounded, hurt, or in pain, the way to really deal with it is to name it.

Naming our pain is like turning on the light when we hear noises in the house.  It becomes striped of its capacity to hold us in fear.  When we name our pain we define it; creating boundaries in which it can no longer roam anywhere it pleases.

Our naming constructs a container that can hold corrosive contents.

While pain-suppression tries to convince that there is no pain (so keep going on your merry way), naming our pain gives us the space to breathe again, to catch our breath, pause, turn, stare it in the eyes and tell it that we will not be held hostage any longer.

Call pain out of the shadows, bring it front-and-center and no longer let it hold you in fear.

Co-Creating Melodies

The story is told of a concert pianist who was on the point of beginning a performance when there was a scream from the audience.  A child had left her seat beside her parent and was running around the auditorium.  the concert pianist stepped away from this instrument in order to maintain concentration.  The child ran up the steps onto the stage, sat herself down on the stool, and began to play discordant notes at random as she pleased.  The hushed audience gasped in horror and embarrassment.  The pianist walked toward the child and stood behind her as she played.  The pianist leaned over her hand, and without disturbing her, placed right and left hands outside her two small hands on the keyboard.  The pianist then began to play in response to her notes, weaving their discordant sounds into an improvised melody.  To have thrown the child out would have been to block; to have let her play on would have been to accept; to weave a wonderful melody around her was to receive her as a gift, to over-accept.
                                                                                               - Samuel Wells

You are never and inturruption to Divine Pianist.  Your off notes and broken rhythms are never outside the steady movements of God.  You are, after all, a gift and welcomed to play at the seat of the Great Musician.  So, do not be over-concered with the glares of others or over-whelmed that your timing and technique are fragmented. 

This is what it means to be a child.

It is not yours to orchestrate each stanza and perfect each measure.  This is the work of the Conductor, who, as you get lost in the delight of play, hems you into a bigger song.

It Will Not Dismay

Love; it will not betray you

Dismay or enslave you, it will set you free

Be more like the man you were made to be

- Mumford and Sons, Sigh No More

Others can only give you glimpses to the depth and fullness of Love; for others also know how to take things away: innocence, hope and ironically, even love.  Filtered and dispensed through imperfect people, Love can woo us closer and then abruptly leave us abandoned.  We've smelled it's sweet aroma and have been repulsed by its foul stench.  When left to manage on our own, Love plays games.

We feel foolish, silly, skeptical, angry, jaded, wounded, pissed, embittered, cynical, hurt.

We swear to the stars and vow to the heavens that we will not let "love" do this to us again.  And so having tasted its fickle flavor we pass on its future offerings. 

Yet this is not the true nature of Love.

Love given from the Source is free from all impurities.  It has never been touched or tainted by another and it is given without a catch, a hitch, or strings attached.  If you drink this Love from the Deep Well you will be forever refreshed.

More like you were made to be.

May you, in spite of past experience be open to receive from Love.  May it quench your longing, free your pain, and imbold you to forgive.

Calculating the Past

If the only way for you to move forward in life is to make perfect sense of what happened in the past then you will never live into the best of each day.

Our constant need to figure out why things happened the way they did (so we can engineer a perfect outcome in the future) brings no guarantees.  It only gives the illusion that our anxiety and worry are actually assets.

We are attracted to our over-scrutinizing-trend-predicting way of thinking because it constructs a world where we are in control.  Yet there is only one truth to this addictive way of operating:  we are not.

Every day situations arise, events unfold and others behave, in ways that we could not have predicted, expected or ever thought possible.  Sometimes we are surprised with joy and other times we are shocked in horror.  Trying to make sense of the things that leave us perplexed only captivates us to the past.

The conduit for real freedom is not found in the firm over-analyzing closed grip of the past but, paradoxically, in the open handed posture of awareness and mystery.  No problem to solve, no history to construct just the attentive nature that allows us to wonder, honor, and marvel at all that life brings.

This is not a passive approach where we resign ourselves to the gods as they see fit.  Rather this is an active co-participation (a giving, a receiving and giving again) with Life Itself.

It’s in the past.  What’s done is done.  Wonder.  Awe.

How Loud Is Your Fear?

Fear of failure.

Fear of being “found out”.

Fear of not being as good as others think you are.

Fear that you will have to try harder than you ever have before.

Fear that it will require you to dig deep.

Fear that you don’t have enough time.

Fear that you can’t live up to your standards.
Fear that it can’t be done.
Fear that it has never been done that way before.

Fear that you won’t fit in.

Fear that no one will buy it.

Fear that no one will listen.

Fear that it will kick you to the outside.

Fear that there is no going back.

When your fear gets loud, it’s probably an indicator that you are on the verge of something great.

...keep going.

Tug-Of-War

The Artist and the CEO are in a constant tug-of-war for my attention and affection.  I like the unencumbered free-thinking idealism of the Artist and yet I am attracted to the clear-headed achievement of the CEO.

The problem arises when these two are left to their own devices: if the CEO goes untethered it sells its soul to the highest bidder (no art, just a product pimped) and if the Artist is left alone their creative ideas rarely come to life (no art produced just idealism locked up in their head). 

Both Artist and CEO are needed.  Both have value.

At its best, the Artist keeps the CEO honest and inspired while the CEO sets up the system for the Art to travel.

Sometimes this relationship is a war to the death (have you ever seen a creative mind and a controlling "type A" personality collaborate on a project?) and other times it is a dance of harmonious beauty.

Part of living out your true self is being able to live in the tension of the Artist and CEO.

Step Into Your Life

Wishing you could do what you see someone else doing?  Do you lament that your life is not as interesting as what your “friends” portray in their status updates?  If you keep moving down this path you can be sure you will never step into your unique calling.

The more time you spend focused on what someone else is doing means you have less time and energy to dream and act on what only you can do.

Stop your infatuation with other people's lives...it will keep you from falling in love with your own.

Kessel Run In Less Than 12 Parsecs

I started doodling a TV and the first thing that came to mind (when wondering what should be "on TV") was the Millenium Falcon.

Probably because it is one bad-ass ship.

What would you doodle on your TV?