To What End? (Love Is An Orientation pt. 4)

Part of re-framing the relationship between the Evangelical community and the Gay/Lesbian community requires a dismantling of the following question:

What goal are we (the Evangelical community) trying to accomplish with them (the Gay/Lesbian community)?

This question generates all sorts of answers from: "Helping them see their sin so they can remain celibate" to "Seeing them healed of their same-sex attraction so they can enter into a heterosexual relationship".

This question is poorly framed for the following reasons:

1. Instead of looking for common ground it further divides people into categories of "us" vs. "them" .

2. The question assumes that it is "our" job to "fix" another human being and in doing so we presuppose our relationship over and against the work of God in the life of another individual.

3. It creates a hierarchy of relationship; making a mutually benefiting relationship extremely difficult.

Conversation with those in the Gay/Lesbian community needs to happen in a manner free from agenda. When we approach people with an agenda we error in trying to conform them into our image. Agenda is one-sided. Agenda is different than intentionality. Intentionality suggests a deliberate, "careful" approach; one which allows people to share with a patient, gracious, intentional love. In doing so space is created for God to transform each one of us in his image. We need to be intentional.

In speaking of God's transforming work in our lives, I am not suggesting we are working toward some type of "de-gay-i-fi-cation" (see the movie Saved for reference) for our gay brothers and sisters. Instead we are elevating the conversation from a focus of sexuality to focus on identity and intimacy.

"What then is the goal?" That all of us would grow in an intimate relationship with the God who loves us so deeply that he expressed through his son Jesus; that as we grow more intimate with the Creator we would pursue his kingdom, continually (never claiming to have arrived), casting off all other things that promise intimacy, identity, and self-worth.

May we focus on loving God and loving people, and trust God to work in God's way and in God's time.